January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.

February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels……Helllloooo!!!…..bottles won’t fit in printer!

March - Got really excited…..finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months…..box said “2-4 years!”

April - Trapped on escalator for hours ? power went out!!!

May - Tried to make Kool-Aid…..wrong instructions….8 cups of water won’t fit into those little packets!!!

June - Tried to go water skiing…..couldn’t find a lake with a slope.

July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition…..learned later, the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!

August - Got locked out of my car in rain storm….car swamped because soft-top was open.

September - The capital of California is “C”….isn’t it?

October - Hate M & M’s…..they are so hard to peel.

November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days. Instructions said 1 hour per pound - I weigh 108!!

December - Couldn’t call 911…. “duh”….there’s no “eleven” button on the stupid phone!

This entry was posted on Tuesday, April 22nd, 2008 at 11:00 pm and is filed under All Jokes. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.